


Just Friends

by haruhoshiiii



Category: Super Junior
Genre: KyuWook - Freeform, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-21
Updated: 2020-12-02
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:54:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,925
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27134860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/haruhoshiiii/pseuds/haruhoshiiii
Summary: An alternate universe, where Kyuwook is real.KYUWOOK RPS DRABBLES! :D The storyline's based on real life kyuwook, but the fiction's going to be how their interactions are interpreted by my very kyuwook-biased mind.
Relationships: Cho Kyuhyun/Kim Ryeowook
Comments: 3
Kudos: 19





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Dedicated to my kwulto friends. XD
> 
> I suck at sticking to writing long, chaptered stories, but my desire to write kyuwook things is getting the best of me. I'm honestly doing this for myself (lmao) and for my sanity, but if other people enjoys it with me, that would be great as well. \o///

“What was it, Ryeowook? What was the final straw?” Kyuhyun asked Ryeowook in a low controlled voice. If Ryeowook didn’t know better, anybody listening would think they were just talking about something so casual. But Ryeowook knew this was how Kyuhyun would be whenever he would try to hide his own emotions. “How did I lose you?” Kyuhyun asked as he looked at Ryeowook’s eyes, intently waiting for an answer.

“You were too perfect for me,” Ryeowook calmly replied.

That moment, Kyuhyun’s eyes betrayed his composure, as they started to glint with moist coming from the tears quickly forming. But they both promised they were going to be mature and calm about this closure so Kyuhyun did his very best to stop his emotions from bursting out. “Make me understand.”

“Kyuhyun,” Ryeowook started. “I loved being with you. You were everything I ever wanted. And I was so happy. You made me so happy. Until,” Ryeowook paused when he noticed his pitch getting higher. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before looking back at Kyuhyun whose eyes never left Ryeowook’s. “Until I realized you also had everything I ever wanted... for myself.”

Kyuhyun’s expression started to change from confusion to just... pain. He opened his mouth wanting to say something, but he couldn’t come up with anything.

Ryeowook smiled sadly, hating to see such a hurt expression on Kyuhyun’s face. But it took him a long time and a lot of thinking to gather enough resolve to do this, so he made sure he was going to do it properly. He sat closer to Kyuhyun and cupped Kyuhyun’s cheek with his hand.

“I’m sorry, Kyuhyun-ah,” Ryeowook apologized. “Believe me, I am happy for you. I am happy for everything that you have right now. You know how much I wish only the best things to happen for you. You deserve everything. But the more I see you shine, the more I realize how dull my own star is.” Ryeowook’s breathing started to hitch. “When you call me and tell me about your new projects, I do feel happy for you. You know that. But I can’t help but think about my own life. How everyone is so busy, while I’m at home, doing my own stuff independently. I feel so left out in life, Kyuhyun. I love you, and I know I have you, but to be perfectly honest, I feel like I’m stuck at some place, and… I’ve never felt this lonely.”

Ryeowook decided to go with this lie. If anyone knew best about Ryeowook’s feeling of inferiority, it was Kyuhyun. Kyuhyun always did his best to protect Ryeowook’s ego, from everything, as in every single thing, that ever threatened to hurt it. And what Ryeowook said was partly true. He did undergo crisis from time to time, about his life, about his career. However, to say that Kyuhyun’s soaring career was a trigger for it was the one of biggest lies he had ever come up with. Ryeowook was Kyuhyun’s #1 fan. Kyuhyun’s successes felt like Ryeowook’s own, and he loved being able to see it and hear from it directly from Kyuhyun himself. Ryeowook never felt comfortable talking about his own projects, but he could endlessly and tirelessly brag about every single detail of Kyuhyun’s life. Watching Kyuhyun grow and shine from a timid little duckling way back the first time he met him, to the bright shining star that he is now will always make Ryeowook feel enormously proud. And nothing is ever going to change that.

“I’m sorry for feeling this way, Kyu,” Ryeowook continued. “I thought I loved you enough to be able to overcome my own anxieties, but it seems like I’ve overestimated myself. I’m sorry for being weak.”

Kyuhyun still couldn’t find anything to say to respond to what Ryeowook had finally opened up to him. He had no idea it was how Ryeowook felt all along. He could recall all those times when he first told Ryeowook about everything, which was what he did every single time, and he genuinely thought Ryeowook was happy for him. How could he be such an insensitive dumbass and not think about Ryeowook’s feelings? How could he even protect Ryeowook, if he was the person hurting Ryeowook the most?

“Please don’t feel bad about this,” Ryeowook said, as if reading the thoughts running in Kyuhyun’s mind. “It’s not your fault. It was never your fault, Kyu. I am the one with issues, and I have to settle these myself. You do not have any fault in this.”

Kyuhyun just looked at him, unsure about everything anymore.

“It’s just that... whenever I’m with you, I keep seeing a part of myself which I despise. And I don’t like how it felt. I–” Ryeowook paused. “I don’t like who I’ve become. And I need some time to think things through. Alone.”

“I’m sorry,” Kyuhyun was able to bring himself to say.

Ryeowook shook his head. “I told you, it wasn’t your fault. I didn’t want to tell you any of these thinking you’d blame yourself for it. But I had to be completely honest, so you would finally understand why it’s never going to work out between us.”

“I’m sorry,” Kyuhyun said again.

“Kyu, I said it’s not—”

“But can you kiss me?”

Ryeowook could only look at Kyuhyun, unsure whether what he heard was right.

“Please kiss me, Ryeowook,” Kyuhyun begged.

His willpower was obviously depleted by their conversation because Ryeowook couldn’t find it in himself to refuse Kyuhyun’s request. Ryeowook leaned in and softly placed his lips on Kyuhyun’s.

With that, Ryeowook could feel Kyuhyun’s tears slowly stream down his face. Ryeowook pulled back to take a look, and his heart broke even more. Kyuhyun wasn’t the type of person to cry over sad things. Kyuhyun always had this strong facade, even in front of Ryeowook. The only times Kyuhyun cried was out of extreme happiness. But this was the first time Ryeowook saw him cry such painful tears, and it was excruciatingly painful for Ryeowook to watch. It was as if his heart was being stepped on, totally crushed on the ground.

Ryeowook, feeling his own tears on his face, held Kyuhyun’s face on both of his hands and kissed him again. 

Ryeowook moved his lips slowly, and tenderly, and he felt Kyuhyun respond to his gesture. Kyuhyun gathered Ryeowook in his arms, pulling the latter on his lap. Ryeowook could feel Kyuhyun’s controlled desire as he felt the other’s arms grip his shoulders tightly pulling Ryeowook even closer. 

Slowly feeling himself give in, Ryeowook’s fingers tangled themselves on Kyuhyun’s soft, fluffy hair, as he pulled the other’s face closer. Ryeowook immediately parted his lips the moment he felt Kyuhyun’s tongue ask for permission.

The warmth from the tears earlier was replaced by the heated passion between them. Who was Ryeowook kidding? He can never get over this man. But it wasn’t like getting over Kyuhyun was part of the original plan anyway. He was going to create some distance between them, hopefully at least back to how they were before they realized their feelings for each other. He never intended on getting over Kyuhyun as he knew it was close to impossible, but he knew he had to let Kyuhyun go.

But Ryeowook decided to do all that and face the pain later. Right now, all that matters is the Kyuhyun in his arms and having him stay there for a few hours which will probably become their last.

They parted their lips, as they both gasped for air, obviously consumed by their need for each other’s proximity. But not long after, Kyuhyun latched his lips on the nook of Ryeowook’s neck and shoulder, which made Ryeowook immediately tilt his head to the side to give the other better access.

That was the other thing. Kyuhyun knew every detail about Ryeowook, and that includes the places in his body that make Ryeowook lose all reason, and totally give in to his desires. Kyuhyun knew where to touch him. Kyuhyun knew how to touch him. And Ryeowook couldn’t imagine anybody else doing it to him. 

Likewise, Ryeowook knew Kyuhyun’s body with the same accuracy. They were each other firsts after all. Since they got together at a young age, they matured along with each other, and that included their sexual maturity. But now that Ryeowook thinks about it, breaking up with Kyuhyun also meant giving up the right to be the only one touching him. The thought sent an inexplicable feeling all over Ryeowook, and he held Kyuhyun’s face in his hands once again and brought their lips together for an open kiss. This time, free from the earlier inhibitions. Ryeowook kissed Kyuhyun wantonly to which Kyuhyun responded with equal desire. 

Not breaking the kiss, Kyuhyun finally stood up, carrying Ryeowook who had his legs wrapped around the former. He gently laid Ryeowook’s back on the bed, pulling their lips apart so he could look into Ryeowook’s eyes. They stared at each other's eyes for a few seconds, before Kyuhyun roamed his gaze and gently caressed the face of the person he loves the most.

Kyuhyun’s eyes started with Ryeowook’s forehead, which was a frequent recipient of his “I’m going to work” kisses. He knew by the way Ryeowook blushed how much the latter loved it when he kisses him on the forehead, and their height difference made it conveniently perfect. Kyuhyun smiled as he remembered how Ryeowook would bury his face on the former’s chest to hide his blushing.

Kyuhyun’s thumb found its way to Ryeowook’s groomed eyebrows. He chuckled softly as he remembered so vividly how animated those eyebrows are. The way it dances along with Ryeowook’s emotions, sometimes betraying its owner whenever the owner tries to hide his emotions. Especially when he’s throwing his tantrums. Kyuhyun gave it a light peck with a warm smile embedded on his lips.

Then he gently rubbed his thumb on Ryeowook’s fluffy cheek, feeling the latter’s smooth skin which Kyuhyun knew how much time Ryeowook consumes each day just to maintain its plump, smooth texture. Kyuhyun would sometimes whine about how long his skin care routine would be, taking up some of their babe time, but he also loved seeing Ryeowook glow. He was the most beautiful person for Kyuhyun, he sometimes couldn’t take his eyes off his favorite person. Most of the time, he would just fight the urge to look at Ryeowook at all, especially on stage, because looking at Ryeowook meant looking at him with his heart in his eyes, and that also meant another scolding from the managers.

Kyuhyun lightly pecked Ryeowook’s nose next which he always found so cute. Ryeowook wrinkled his nose as a reaction, making Kyuhyun smile as it was always how Ryeowook would react whenever he did that. He smiled even more, thinking about how the man beneath has always been the Kim Ryeowook that he has come to love since god knows when, and how he has never changed. Or so he thought.

Kyuhyun brushed his thumb on Ryeowook’s lips, those lips which could drive Kyuhyun insane, anytime, anywhere. He always thanked the heavens for giving Ryeowook to him, at least he can devour those lips almost any time he wanted, without having to go to jail after.

But it seems like he won’t be able to do it anymore after today.

He felt Ryeowook’s thumb brush his face to wipe the tears which started to fall once again, without Kyuhyun realizing it. And then their eyes met again, both filled with tears and sadness. Ryeowook pulled Kyuhyun into another kiss. 

Kyuhyun’s lips started to go down Ryeowook’s jaw, and back to that sweet spot on his neck, making Ryeowook whimper in excessive desire, giving Kyuhyun the motivation to go even lower. But Ryeowook felt the abrupt absence of Kyuhyun’s touch so his eyes fluttered open to see what the matter was.

Kyuhyun had his hands on the first button of Ryeowook’s shirt but it did not move. He only stared at Ryeowook’s eyes, as if asking for permission whether he could continue.

Ryeowook smiled as he felt his heart beat faster, overwhelmed with warmth. Always a gentleman, this Kyuhyun. Ryeowook did not have any idea how he’s going to live without him.

With a soft smile and a gentle nod from Ryeowook, Kyuhyun slowly took off the pieces of clothing standing between them as they spent the night with them just loving each other, as if an entire world outside them didn’t exist.

  
  
  


Ryeowook woke up as an arm snaked its way around him. It was still nighttime, and they were both enveloped by darkness, only the glimmer of the moon providing them a bit of light.

Ryeowook’s mind immediately flashed back to how perfectly their bodies connected, as if they were both molded to fit each other. The way Kyuhyun felt inside him, filling up every void in his being. If Plato’s Symposium was right, if humans were originally created with four arms, four legs, and a head with two faces, but were split into half, and both were to find their other halves, then there was Ryeowook’s other half right here. Kyuhyun was Ryeowook’s half. Kyuhyun is Ryeowook’s half. There they were, completing life’s assignment of finding their soulmate. But why is the world being so difficult? Why is something so perfect and right judged by the world as something horrendously wrong? 

“Ryeowook, please don’t leave me,” Kyuhyun gently pleaded, tightening his hold around Ryeowook’s body which fit perfectly in his arms. Their bare skin vulnerably touching each other’s, after letting off layers of clothes and pretenses.

But Ryeowook did not reply. Ryeowook could not reply. He only held Kyuhyun's hands tighter, and kissed them lightly.

Kyuhyun nuzzled as closely as physically possible, instantly regretting what he said as he felt Ryeowook’s damp cheeks. “I’m sorry, Ryeowook,” he apologized as he pulled Ryeowook closer. “I’m sorry. It’s just that, with you, I feel selfish. You’re the only one I want in this world, Ryeowook. I have nothing else but you.”

Ryeowook nodded, silently accepting Kyuhyun’s apology as he bit his lips, trying hard not to let a sob escape. But what Kyuhyun said wasn’t true though, Ryeowook mentally disagreed. Kyuhyun had the rest of the world at his feet; a world that was willing to watch and listen to him for as often as humanly possible. As much as Ryeowook knew every part of Kyuhyun’s body, he knew all of Kyuhyun’s wants and dreams even more. And he could see that Kyuhyun’s dreams were already within his arm’s reach. He had a whole world ahead of him, and Ryeowook couldn’t risk destroying any of those chances for his most beloved. Seeing Kyuhyun’s own world break apart would be like seeing Ryeowook’s whole world crash in front of him.

Ryeowook had nothing, and nobody else, except for Kyuhyun. Kyuhyun was Ryeowook’s entire world. But as so many things have proven, it seems like the only way to preserve it was by not being in it. And Ryeowook had finally come into terms with that. No matter how much he wished differently, no matter how fervently he prayed for it every night, he knew it was not possible. Not in this life. Not in the life they were born with. And not in the life they chose to live. So no matter how much it hurt him, he had finally accepted that the only way to keep his world whole was to remove himself from it. In Kyuhyun’s world, Ryeowook felt like a blackhole. So he would just silently watch his world continue to turn—without him.

Kyuhyun felt Ryeowook’s breaths go back to normal, which he took as a sign as Ryeowook finally falling back into sleep. “I love you,” Kyuhyun carefully whispered. “I love you so much I just want to spend the rest of my life with you.”

‘ _I love you, too_ ,’ Ryeowook responded in his head. ‘ _I love you too much, Kyuhyun. I love you enough to endure spending the rest of my life without you._ ’

Ryeowook softly kissed Kyuhyun’s forehead before carefully getting off the bed to pick up his clothes and leave. He cannot allow himself to sleep beside Kyuhyun and wake up to another morning seeing the latter beside him. He had to fight the urge to do that. Or else he’d have a harder time waking up to all the other mornings with Kyuhyun no longer in it.


	2. Through the Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> KyuWook's quiet conversation on a peaceful night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by this KyuWook fancam during the Seoul Music Awards 2020! And the endless 'Through the Night' loop. :D  
> https://twitter.com/haruhoshiiii/status/1330360278731649026?s=20
> 
> I also recommend listening to these songs, for better feels~ :D  
> 1\. Maktub's To You My Light; and of course,  
> 2\. IU's Through the Night
> 
> Enjoy!!! <333

_**To You, My Light** _

Ryeowook carefully shifted so as not to wake the person beside him. He propped himself up on one elbow to get a better look at the other’s face. The lights in the room were turned off, but the unique bedside clock which his partner adored so much brought enough light for Ryeowook to see his lover’s distinct features despite the dark. 

Ryeowook quietly watched the steady rhythm of Kyuhyun’s chest, rising and falling along with his calm breaths. Not too long after, Kyuhyun’s lips twitched into a smile. ‘ _I wonder what he’s dreaming about_ ,’ Ryeowook thought to himself as he absentmindedly brought his hand towards the sleeping man’s face, gently rubbing his thumb across Kyuhyun’s soft cheek. Ryeowook sighed in contentment as his own lips formed a smile.

“I’m sorry, did I wake you up?” Ryeowook whispered with his slightly raspy voice when Kyuhyun’s eyes slowly fluttered open.

“Kind of,” Kyuhyun answered in a whisper, smiling, as he closed one of his eyes, trying to fight the sleep off.

“I’m sorry,” Ryeowook whispered again and laid back down, his face cuddled against Kyuhyun’s chest. 

Kyuhyun wrapped his arms around Ryeowook and planted a kiss on the other’s hair, making Ryeowook cuddle against Kyuhyun’s chest even closer. “What’s the matter? Can’t sleep?” Kyuhyun asked.

“I kind of woke up in the middle of my sleep and thought I wanted to look at your face. But you were smiling, so I wondered what you were dreaming about.” Ryeowook moved back a bit so he could lift his head and look at Kyuhyun’s face again, his arms still wrapped around the other’s waist. “Do you remember?”

Kyuhyun paused, trying to remember what he was dreaming about just a few minutes ago. “Ah, yes!” he excitedly said, pleased that he actually remembered.

“What was it?” Ryeowook curiously asked.

“We were in our old practice room back when we were still rookies, and I had my song book of Sung Sikyung songs in my hand,” Kyuhyun recalled, smiling as he remembered how that song book almost became his bible, bringing the book and his Walkman with him everywhere, and practicing the songs whenever he can; partly because he personally liked the songs, and partly because Ryeowook loved hearing him sing those songs.

“We?” Ryeowook asked. “Who was with you in the dream?”

“Are you jealous?” Kyuhyun teased.

Ryeowook rolled his eyes. “You know I’m not the jealous type.”

“Sadly, that’s true,” Kyuhyun laughed before continuing his recollection of his dream. “There were a few of us in the room but I couldn’t really remember who’s who. But you were definitely there!”

“Don’t make stuff up,” Ryeowook said, lightly poking Kyuhyun’s side to tickle him.

“I’m not making it up! You were there!” Kyuhyun insisted, and caught the other’s hand in his to stop the other from tickling him.

“What was I doing in your dream, then?” Ryeowook asked, still not convinced.

Kyuhyun gave him a devilish grin. “What do you think you were doing that made me smile in my sleep?”

“Pervert!” Ryeowook slightly yelled as he pushed Kyuhyun away, which was exactly the reaction Kyuhyun was hoping for, making the latter laugh in satisfaction.

“I’m kidding, I’m kidding!” Kyuhyun said as he pulled Ryeowook closer so that he had his beloved wrapped in his arms once again. “I actually don’t know,” Kyuhyun replied, squinting his eyes trying his best to recall that bit of his dream.

“See, you’re making this up.”

“No, I swear you were there- Ah! I remember now! You were weird.” Ryeowook lightly hit Kyuhyun’s chest, making the other chuckle. “But you really were being weird!”

“It’s your dream so you’re the one who’s weird!” Ryeowook pouted.

Kyuhyun pinched Ryeowook’s cheeks, laughing at the other’s reaction. “You were sitting at the corner of the practice room but you had your back towards us. It had the same vibe as whenever you were mad at us, so I think you were indeed mad at us, but I don’t know why. But-” Kyuhyun couldn’t stop himself from laughing.

“But what??” Ryeowook asked, scared about how silly weird he must have been in the dream.

“But you didn’t notice there was a mic dangling right above you so we could totally hear everything,” Kyuhyun continued, still laughing.

Ryeowook laughed. “What was I ranting about this time?”

“You weren’t ranting though,” Kyuhyun replied as his fingers combed through Ryeowook’s hair. “You were singing Sung Sikyung sunbae-nim’s song with me, though I wonder why you had your back turned against us.”

Ryeowook laughed lightly. “Seems like your subconscious is better at remembering things,” he said before burying his face on Kyuhyun’s chest once again.

“What do you mean? Tell me,” Kyuhyun said slightly pushing Ryeowook's body away to see his expression.

“I already told you about this before,” Ryeowook tried to remind him, but Kyuhyun cannot seem to retrieve any memory, mainly because he honestly didn’t have any idea what the context of the memory he’s trying to find was. Ryeowook sighed in defeat. “I told you this before, when we were drinking that night during Teukkie hyung’s birthday. You know, why I seldom sing Sung Sikyung’s songs on the radio, even though we practiced a lot of his songs during our vocal training sessions, and even when we were left alone in the dorm.”

“Ahhhh,” Kyuhyun said, finally remembering. He hugged Ryeowook closely, and rested his cheek on the smaller’s head. “I’m sorry,” Kyuhyun said softly.

“Silly,” Ryeowook replied. “How many times have I told you that it wasn’t your fault? Besides, it helped me find my own vocal color, too. If I kept singing Sung Sikyung’s songs on broadcast, people might have kept comparing the both of us and who knows, you might have been removed from the group,” Ryeowook teased.

“I know, I know, I owe you everything, Kim Ryeowook. Thank you for your sacrifice,” Kyuhyun laughed, but he didn’t mean to be sarcastic at all.

Ryeowook lightly hit Kyuhyun’s chest again.

“No, really. I owe you a lot, Ryeonggu. I wouldn’t be where I am without you,” Kyuhyun said, in a sincere tone this time, to make sure he actually got the right message across.

“Quit it, Kyu. It’s too early to be this sappy~” Ryeowook complained, but he couldn’t stop himself from smiling. Kyuhyun never held himself back when it came to showering Ryeowook with appreciation, but that didn’t mean Kyuhyun only said things for the sake of saying them. Kyuhyun was someone who always says what he means, and means what he says when it comes to the two of them, so Ryeowook never had to second guess anything. And Ryeowook appreciated that a lot since he was someone who has the tendency to get anxious over the smallest things. 

Ryeowook smiled even wider when he placed his ear on Kyuhyun’s chest, the sound of the other’s heartbeats made him feel like he found his place in this world.

“But this is actually the perfect time to be sappy!” Kyuhyun protested, briefly squeezing Ryeowook tightly in his arms, inhaling Ryeowook’s floral scent. “But you do know how much I love your voice, right?”

“Of course. You love everything about me.”

Kyuhyun laughed, but he couldn’t even try denying the other’s statement, not even playfully. “You’ve been singing Sung Sikyung songs lately, though?” Kyuhyun pointed out.

“Only for weddings. You know how Two People had become a wedding anthem, right?”

Kyuhyun could only laugh, since he knows too well how true this is. He himself could no longer count by his fingers how many weddings he went to had Two People as their wedding song. “What do you want to be _our_ wedding song?” Kyuhyun asked, but he immediately regretted his words the moment he said them.

Silence.

“I- I mean, hypothetically. Hypothetically.”

“I don’t know. I don’t really think about it. I just like being paid to sing at people’s weddings. You know what, if I didn’t become an idol, maybe I would have become a wedding singer,” Ryeowook said. He bit his lip as his tendency to become overly talkative when he’s nervous has manifested once again. ‘ _Maktub’s To You, My Light_ ,’ Ryeowook’s thoughts replied, but he had to leave it unsaid.

It was a mutual agreement between them two of them to never talk about weddings, or at least their own. And it wasn’t because they didn’t want to. At this point, they both knew their places in each other’s lives, and if they were normal people, their marriage would definitely be in the works by now. But they weren’t normal people. They were Super Junior’s Ryeowook and Kyuhyun. They knew all the complications that came along with it, and that includes how close to impossible getting married to each other was.

They finally had the courage to talk about it after drinking a few bottles of soju together one Thursday night. But even though they mutually agreed on it and to try their best to not talk about it, they both knew it was easier said than done. But they both try anyway.

However, it seems like Kyuhyun slipped tonight, and Ryeowook wasn’t ready to deal with his suppressed emotions, so he prayed that Kyuhyun would faithfully stick to their agreement and let this one go.

“Then that means you wouldn’t have joined Super Junior and you wouldn’t have met me,” Kyuhyun replied in a matter-of-fact tone.

Ryeowook felt relieved at Kyuhyun’s reply. “You wouldn’t have become Super Junior either,” Ryeowook replied.

“What do you mean?” Kyuhyun asked.

“If I didn’t become a member of Super Junior, that means I didn’t join ChinChin Song Festival, and that means you wouldn’t have joined ChinChin Song Festival, too, so you wouldn’t get scouted for Super Junior,” Ryeowook confidently explained.

Kyuhyun laughed. “You sound really sure about that!”

“Am I wrong though?” Ryeowook looked up and stuck his tongue out.

“Maybe? Maybe not?” Kyuhyun replied in a vague manner, knowing that giving Ryeowook a firm denial was something he would regret the next day. “But if that happened, then I might have become a wedding singer, too, and I’d be singing for the wedding next to the wedding hall where you are and we still would have met, and you would still fall in love with the way I sing Sung Sikyung sunbae-nim’s songs, and we still would have gotten together.” It was Kyuhyun’s turn to get cocky.

“Where is this confidence coming from?” Ryeowook laughed and shook his head, resting it on Kyuhyun’s chest again.

“Remember when we were at the training room and we would share the earphones of my Walkman whenever we listened to his songs? You would stare at me when I wasn’t looking, but you totally forgot we had the whole mirror wall so I could totally see your face,” Kyuhyun laughed as he recalled Ryeowook’s cute face which would look away when Kyuhyun would try to look back.

“Hey!” was all Ryeowook could say, making Kyuhyun laugh even more. “Who knows, I might have become an ice cream shop owner or something!”

“Then I might have become a tteokbokki shop owner and owned the stall beside yours and we would still bond over how we’re not generating enough income, and we would drink together and you’d still end up falling head over heels in love with me!” Kyuhyun continued teasing.

Ryeowook rolled his eyes and pushed himself away and turning his back from Kyuhyun, lying down on his other side.

Kyuhyun always found Ryeowook’s reactions to his teasing adorable, but he knew when to draw the line or else he was going to get the cold shoulder treatment for half a day, max.

Kyuhyun shifted closer towards Ryeowook and gave the latter a peck on the cheek, before nuzzling on his neck. “I just meant that no matter how we may have ended up becoming, I still would have chased after you wherever you went until you fell in love with me, too. TOO~” Kyuhyun emphasized the last word. “Okay?” he continued. “Surely, I would have fallen in love with you first. I mean, how could I not? Have you seen yourself in the mirror?”

“Stop overcompensating, Kyu,” Ryeowook said, but he couldn’t help but laugh. No matter how silly his tantrums were, Kyuhyun always indulged him, that sometimes he was starting to wonder whether Kyuhyun was turning him into a spoiled brat. But Ryeowook’s line of thought was cut short when he felt Kyuhyun bombard his face with feather kisses, making Ryeowook feel ticklish all over.

“Do you want to go outside for a walk?” Kyuhyun offered after the two of them calmed themselves down from laughing too much, with Ryeowook laughing out loud which, upon hearing his laughter, just made Kyuhyun laugh even more, which made Ryeowook laugh even harder, hence the vicious cycle of laughters that night.

Ryeowook happily nodded and they both got off bed to change.

_**Through the Night** _

“Ryeong?” Kyuhyun gently called his lover’s name, breaking the comfortable blanket of silence resting upon them, their gaze focused on the starlit sky. They were seated on a bench in the park near their apartment’s building. It was just 2:03 in the morning, too early for normal people to be walking around, hence the couple felt relatively at ease to act as how they usually would when it was just the two of them.

“Hmm?” the lover replied, with a hint of sleepiness in his voice.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t fight for you the way I would have wanted to,” Kyuhyun gently said, still looking up towards the night sky. “I’m sorry I couldn’t shout to the rest of the world how much I love you.” Kyuhyun felt Ryeowook’s sudden grip on his fingers which were intertwined with his, but there was no verbal response that followed, making Kyuhyun chuckle. “Was that too sad?” Kyuhyun asked; the smile did not leave his face, but he did feel a knot in his heart. He knew that Ryeowook knew what he meant.

He felt Ryeowook gently shake his head which was comfortably resting on Kyuhyun’s shoulder, but again, not a single word was spoken. Kyuhyun sighed as he looked down at their fingers perfectly filling each other’s gaps. He gently rubbed the back of Ryeowook’s hand such that his hands sandwiched his beloved’s. There was no way Kyuhyun would be able to let this hand go, no matter how hard they tried. And they did try—multiple times, even. But during those times when they were apart—or, _especially during those times when they were apart_ —those times when they tried to convince that their love for each other was just circumstantial and fleeting, they came to realize how deep in love they were with each other. Indeed, they were too far gone, and they knew that fighting against their feelings was pointless.

If Kyuhyun was going to be perfectly honest though, they did survive on their own. To say that they cannot live without each other was something neither of them would be fond of hearing, or saying. They knew very well that they were very much capable of living by themselves. They were grown men, after all. But despite that, there was also this other prevailing truth which Kyuhyun knew just as well, right from the start: Ryeowook was someone he was going to love for the rest of his life. He was just thankful he was wise enough to realize that he had to actually, and actively, fight for the privilege of staying by Ryeowook’s side for as long as they lived.

_“Hyung… Are you…” Jonghoon hesitated. “Are you okay?”  
_

_Kyuhyun’s head heavily laid on the passenger seat’s headrest, his gaze towards the car’s window was aimless. “Mmmm,” he weakly replied without looking at the other person.  
_

_“Okay…” was all Jonghoon could think of saying, not knowing how he was supposed to make Kyuhyun talk as he also didn’t want to pry and come off as too intrusive. But he felt more and more devastated himself as he watched Kyuhyun’s bright facade on TV show filmings drastically droop down to low spirits the moment the celebrity enters the car. Despite Kyuhyun’s appearances in several shows, aside from him having commendable professionalism, he was actually a very private person as well. His playful teasing persona was an effective mask of what his true feelings were. And he never let his guard down, not even in front of some of the closest staff they have been working with for a long time now. Jonghoon was an exception though. Jonghoon was one of Ryeowook’s most trusted friends, which meant Kyuhyun trusted him as well._ _  
_

_Ryeowook, on the other hand, was the opposite. Ryeowook always wore his heart on his sleeves, and his eyes screamed what he truly felt. This was why he opted out of most variety shows and asked the company to decline all potential offers, unless it was with the rest of the group where he can make his presence the least impactful whenever he chooses to. Unlike Kyuhyun who could be both candid and reserved, Ryeowook’s eyes would instantly show even the slightest discomfort he felt during that moment. It would go unnoticed by most fans, but Kyuhyun would point it out whenever they would watch the actual airing of the shows together, and Ryeowook would wholly agree with him every time. But even though it sounds like it’s a bad thing, this actually works fine for Ryeowook since he never intended to be a full variety show celebrity anyway. Ryeowook only wanted to sing, and as long as he can do that, there was nothing else he could ask for._ _  
_

_However, despite being opposites somehow, this only made things work perfectly well between the two. They both valued privacy, and their career decisions helped them achieve that. Not to mention how seldom their schedules clashed despite how busy Kyuhyun was. He always, always made sure he made time for Ryeowook. Kyuhyun’s colleagues were, and still are, impressed with how efficient he is at work, but the real reason was that Kyuhyun only made it work because he knew spending longer time at work meant lesser time for Ryeowook. And it was not up for discussion. For Kyuhyun, it was as simple as this: Ryeowook’s time was Ryeowook’s time. And Ryeowook loved and appreciated that, which made him treasure Kyuhyun even more, eventually becoming Kyuhyun’s #1 fan (needless to say)._ _  
_

_This was why everything was so painful for Jonghoon to watch. By some sudden wave of practicality, the lovers who were in perfect pace with each other, finally gave in to their company’s request to try working things out separately, emphasizing how this would give Kyuhyun an even better chance at seizing all available career opportunities, and that they had ‘to strike while the iron was hot.’ They have had several discussions with the management about this topic and they always turned it down, with the promise of practicing caution. Until suddenly, Ryeowook asked Kyuhyun if they should try it out. Kyuhyun was vehemently against the idea at first, but Ryeowook insisted, saying he needed time to think things through himself. And it was true. Ryeowook wanted to see things outside the relationship, and see where the realizations that would come with it would take him._ _  
_

_“Hyung,” Jonghoon called out to Kyuhyun once again. “Do you really think this is working?” he finally got to ask, as his pent up frustrations finally pushed him towards the edge of his patience, after seeing Kyuhyun glance at his phone and sigh heavily seeing that the message or call he wanted so badly still hasn’t come through._ _  
_

_“What is not working?” Kyuhyun asked, feigning ignorance._ _  
_

_“You and Ryeowook hyung.”_ _  
_

_Kyuhyun heaved another sigh and closed his eyes, pretending to sleep._ _  
_

_But Jonghoon’s eyes were focused on the road as he drove so he didn’t see Kyuhyun’s attempt to shoot the conversation down. “I just don’t understand why I have to see you two being miserable apart. Clearly, this isn’t working and you both know that,” Jonghoon spat out. “I am saying this respectfully, by the way,” he added a disclaimer, not wanting to get into Kyuhyun’s bad side._ _  
_

_“You’re supposed to be on the company’s side, you know,” Kyuhyun lightly laughed._ _  
_

_Jonghoon took it as a good sign. What he was implying was obviously lifting Kyuhyun’s spirits up, even just by a little. For Jonghoon, if he could at least let a little light shine through towards this dark dungeon which the two created for themselves, then his goal was somehow partially completed. He wanted to get rid of each dungeon which he was stuck in whenever he had to drive them to schedules. But even though he was primarily doing it for himself, he was not the least bit insincere. Jonghoon knew how much they thrived in each other’s presence, and he genuinely believed that whatever the two had was one of the purest things he’s ever seen. “Well, they aren’t the ones who have to drive two lethargic souls day in and day out so they honestly don’t get to have a say on this,” Jonghoon jokingly replied. “Although I would appreciate it if you didn’t tell them about my role in the two of you getting back together for good.”_ _  
_

_“You really think we should get back together, Jonghoon-ah? I mean, don’t you think the company has a point though? That it won’t end well between the two of us anyway, so why should we prolong things and risk both our careers?” Kyuhyun asked, seeking for the young manager’s honest answers, which Kyuhyun realized he has always relied on._ _  
_

_“Because you two tried to end things, and does it look like it’s turning out for the better?” Jonghoon rhetorically asked before letting out a chuckle and lightly shaking his head. “Look at the two of you now. It’s like all life left your bodies. I’m scared my soul will leave mine, too, if this continues.”_ _  
_

_Kyuhyun laughed, always amused by Jonghoon’s way of talking about things, but he knew the guy had a point. “But what if we just have to hold it out? What if we just have to wait for time to pass?”_ _  
_

_“Hyung,” Jonghoon let out a frustrated sigh. “If you two were going to eventually get sick of each other, you would have already. 10 years, or 5 years would have done the trick, or maybe your enlistment. But the way you two look at each other even until now, none of it has changed, hyung.”_ _  
_

_Kyuhyun sighed._ _  
_

_“And do you even realize how Ryeowook hyung looks at you?” Jonghoon laughed, earning a questioning look from Kyuhyun. “Hyung, it’s like you’re the only person in the world. You two create your own space wherever you go and it’s hard to penetrate that invisible barrier sometimes. You ever wondered why fans sometimes type KRY as KR, space, space, and a lot more spaces, Y?”_ _  
_

_“You’re exaggerating,” Kyuhyun denied, but he couldn’t stop his lips from turning into a wide smile._ _  
_

_“I wish I was, hyung. I wish I was,” Jonghoon replied. “I think that’s why the company wants you two to break up for real, even after how you have kept your relationship under wraps for such a long time. Because when the two of you look at each other, it’s enough to make the journalists’ fingers tingle with desire to release dating articles about the two of you. And imagine how hot that news would be. It would shake the entire music industry.”_ _  
_

_“Again, you’re exaggerating, Jonghoon-ah,” Kyuhyun commented._ _  
_

_Jonghoon sighed, wishing once again that he was just exaggerating._ _  
_

_“Are we that cheesy?” Kyuhyun asked, curious about that one particular detail. “Really? We look at each other in such a weird way? Don’t I look at other people the same way I do with Ryeonggu?” Kyuhyun’s heart skipped a beat just by saying the name, and he finally realized what Jonghoon meant._ _  
_

_“I didn’t say it was weird, hyung,” Jonghoon explained. “And no, you two aren’t cheesy either. You don’t intentionally say cringey cheesy things, and sometimes, the two of you would even sit so quietly at the back of the car when I drive you both to schedules. But you express things between each other without actually having to say anything, and that’s actually the thing that makes it much much harder for the company. You guys can just breathe beside each other, and the company would be hella worried that some news sites are going to turn their backs on the goodwill between the companies and finally make an article about the two of you. Some are even pushing their luck, writing both of your names in one headline. Imagine how the company panicked when they saw that.”_ _  
_

_This time, Kyuhyun could no longer hide his smile and let out a pleased chuckle._ _  
_

_“Hyung, that was supposed to make you feel worried!” Jonghoon complained, as he tried to get rid of his second thoughts about pushing through with his mission._ _  
_

_“I’m sorry, I just can’t help it!”_ _  
_

_“Then just give him a call, hyung.”_ _  
_

_“Should I?”_ _  
_

_“Yes!!!”_ _  
_

_“I’ll think about it,” Kyuhyun replied, his wide grin still plastered on his face._ _  
_

_Jonghoon sighed once again, but this time, it was of complete relief. This would earn him a lifetime supply of butter coffee and kimbap rolls from his Ryeowook hyung, once the latter finds out about his good deed. He grins, knowing he has somehow helped the two lovebirds get back together, while securing himself an eternal food source._ _  
_

_Kyuhyun decided to take the stairs towards his dorm’s floor level to give him enough time to think. However, the more steps he took, the faster his heartbeats were. And this only made him anxious about his decision. Is it really a good idea to get back together? Even if he did call Ryeowook, would Ryeowook easily agree to it, when Ryeowook was the person who insisted on spending some time apart in the first place?_ _  
_

_Kyuhyun was losing his mind once again, berating himself for being overly optimistic about how Ryeowook would respond._ _  
_

_“Kyu,” Hyukjae called him when he entered their dormitory. But Kyuhyun was too tired and lost in his own thoughts, he only managed to respond to his dorm mate with a wave._ _  
_

_Devoid of energy, probably because of the sudden bouts of anxiety and the day’s exhaustion finally started to creep into his system, Kyuhyun weakly opened the door to his room._ _  
_

_“Kyu,” another voice called him. This time, it was an all too familiar voice, yet it felt like it has been ages since he last heard it. Kyuhyun was not able to immediately respond to the call. “Kyu… Kyukyu,” the voice yearningly called him again._ _  
_

_Kyuhyun, without a thought, dropped his bag to the ground and rushed towards the person he missed the most, as if he was gathering the long lost piece of himself. “Ryeowook-ah,” Kyuhyun cried._ _  
_

_“I’m sorry, Kyu,” Ryeowook said, as quiet cries from the both of them filled the room. “I shouldn’t have left you.”_ _  
_

_Kyuhyun shook his head and hugged the smaller frame in his arms tighter. “You’re here now,” Kyuhyun said as he fought against his sobs. “You’re here now,” he repeated and buried his face on the nook between the other’s neck and shoulder, his favorite human scent bringing all his senses back to life._ _  
_

_Ryeowook nodded, unable to utter another word as his cries have completely taken over him. His fists had a tight grip on the taller’s favorite gray cardigan which smelled of vanilla and baby powder, the scent Ryeowook longed to bury his nose against for several weeks now._ _  
_

_“Let’s not do that again, please,” Kyuhyun pleaded, his tone was a mix of desperation and conviction._ _  
_

_Ryeowook nodded against his chest. “Never, Kyu. Never.”_

  
  


“You did shout to the world how much you loved me, though. Several times,” Ryeowook finally replied, smiling. His heart feeling warm and fuzzy as he remembered several occasions of Kyuhyun's public declaration of his love, which earned them scoldings from their managers every time. But that didn't stop either of them from doing it, as the mischievous maknaes that they were—aside from the fact that they _do_ love each other that much.

“But that was on broadcast!” Kyuhyun laughed.

“Were those untrue, then?” Ryeowook asked, as he sat straight and squinted at Kyuhyun.

“No, of course not! You know that,” Kyuhyun denied.

“Of course, I do,” Ryeowook cheekily grinned, earning a soft “Aigoo” and a light pinch on his nose which he crunched out of reflex.

Kyuhyun found this adorably cute, so he was unable to stop himself from planting a soft kiss on Ryeowook’s forehead. Not that he tried to fight the urge anyway.

Ryeowook returned to his previous comfortable position, and circled his arm around Kyuhyun’s before intertwining their fingers again.

“Kyu?” Ryeowook softly called again.

“Mmmm?” Kyuhyun responded just as softly, lightly leaning his head on Ryeowook’s.

“For what it’s worth, you don’t have to shout to the rest of the world how much you love me.” Ryeowook said, his free hand tracing circles on the back of Kyuhyun’s hand. “You just have to tell me. I’m the only one who has to hear. And you can do it as often as you want to.” Ryeowook felt Kyuhyun’s cheeks rise, and he imagined how soft the smile on Kyuhyun’s face was at that moment.

“Okay,” Kyuhyun replied.

Ryeowook playfully huffed. “That's all?”

“I got it.”

“And?”

“I’ve mentally taken note of it.”

“Aaand?”

“And I love you.”

Ryeowook smiled, pleased. He hugged Kyuhyun’s arm and softly kissed Kyuhyun’s shoulder. He let his face linger for a bit as he inhaled his favorite scent.

Kyuhyun turned his face towards the other and cupped the other’s cheek with his free hand, before lifting his face up and placing his lips on Ryeowook’s. “I love you,” he whispered, their faces still inches away from each other’s. “And I’m going to, for the rest of my life.”

Ryeowook reached up so that their lips briefly touched once again. He looked into the taller’s eyes, which felt like it was staring right into his soul. “I seriously can’t imagine a time when I was not in love with you,” which made himself laugh at the sudden realization. His gaze roamed Kyuhyun’s face, from the eyes he would love to drown in every morning, to the lips he would love to kiss good night. This was the person he would like to spend all his days with, and he’s not going to foolishly let him go ever again. “I love you, Kyu. I really do.” He looked into the dark orbs again whose gaze never left his, and he quietly whispered, “And I’m going to, for the rest of my life.”

**Author's Note:**

> There's the first chapter! :D It wasn't supposed to start this way, but I suddenly wrote this and got so into it the moment I woke up lmao, and I kinda wanted to establish from the get-go that this isn't going to be written in real life chronological order. :3 All chapters are connected to each other (so it's not really a collection of standalone one-shots) but it's going to be written randomly, so I won't have to force myself to write things according to a certain timeline. XD
> 
> Also no, it's not going to be angsty all throughout, I promise... I mean, I hope? Wahahaha. We'll see. :)


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